Well, while I thought things had settled into a relatively good, if slightly annoying, relationship with my mother-in-law, things took a turn when she basically went off the deep end last night and sent me a couple of reallllllly mean text messages. All because my fiance and I are trying to figure out what to do about the dog (and yes, arguing about it).
She said a LOT of things, among them were that I was bullying her son by having a dog, and that it wasn't clean, and that I didn't clean the house enough (we clean like every day), and that I don't use my my time well every day (never mind that I have a job and relationships that I try to invest in, or that I just bought her son a motorbike with my salary so that he could go find a job more conveniently). And that, by Chinese standards, I was bad.
She uses the fact that we're both Christians as an excuse to say things "because it's because she cares" when in fact it's none of her business. In fact, she just wants things to be her way. In my opinion, it's because she doesn't have a job, or even a hobby, and all that's left for her to do is sit around and worry about everything.
Anyways, prayer and advice appreciated. I basically gave my fiance an ultimatum last night, which is, if he wants the relationship to work, we need to sell this house that is right upstairs from her and move somewhere else. ....
I tried to comment on your other one, for whatever reason I couldn't and I was late for work! Anyways I can't relate to the Chinese parent thing so much Jie's parents have been pretty cool, and I probably don't encounter them as much as you and XL's mom cross paths. The ultimatum is legit I agree 100% why even spend $ on rent if you can live 1 floor up with her rent free?? Lol! Almost like living in one of her rooms in a huge house. Also space is good (most Chinese would disagree) The dog..well I can have sympathy for both sides here; my mom has two little shi tzu things whatever...I hate them with a passion and they make me crazy, so if it is really straining your relationship maybe rethink it. I don't know how China deals with dogs nobody wants..probably don't send to a farm in the country haha even still if he really can't be mildly obedient after a year??? Maybe try other options. So just try and move away I think seeing her a little less would help..I'm sure she has useful advice as well as her scorning opinions! I have friends who I can only stand seeing once a week most so try that! As relating to your other blog when I have one of those days...and I got them it usually happens when I'm alone in a public place like a bus stop or a busy restaurant surrounded by Chinese people and I think to myself....what am I doing here haha just try and VPN a movie and have a drink..I also played video games that could help me forget armageddon. I know in Hohhot especially it was difficult in Beijing I had lots of foreigner friends I could easily relate with and could do lots of Western things when I felt that way.Now that I'm back though there are so many things I miss...I guess a good way to close would be the grass is always greener on the other side of the world.
ReplyDeleteCanadian Michael (Fowuds<-Grey's voice)